Coming home for winter break always brings a wave of nostalgia, and as I’m going home to the same places with the same friends doing (slightly) the same things, I can’t help but feel I really am back in high school.

For some, that could sound like an absolute nightmare, but I’m one of the lucky ones who came out (mostly) unscathed with some pretty good memories. 

One of those being my senior prom. 

My hair looked perfect, my makeup looked perfect, my date was perfect…

But most importantly, my dress was perfect. 

Yes, I was young and in love…with that perfect dress. 

Now, in my small world of high school, hiding behind the dream of ‘perfection’ meant smiling through the pain of knowing what it took to get your ‘big ass’ into that perfect dress. 

And there was only one thing in high school I was more infatuated with than my super-cute, athlete boyfriend: the number I saw when I stepped on that scale. It never mattered how low I could get it to go, I was never happy with how I looked.

Looking back now on those high school memories, my girlfriends and I talk about how wonderful we actually looked back then, though we didn’t feel that way at the time. We all agree that if we could talk to our former selves, we would tell them how beautiful they were and explain that feeling good about yourself is about far more that the number on the scale — all the while laughing over wine and brownies and cheese puffs and the extra poundage we have gained since the freshman 15.

And here’s the thing about my high school body: none of it was real. 

I know, huge revelation people! So let me give you a minute for it to sink in.

…

You ready now? Okay! 

When most people are 16 years old, their body isn’t even fully developed yet. On any given day they may be bigger, they may be smaller, they may even be taller, and it is all due to constant change and an influx of hormones.