£198 million. £198 million. You read Neymar’s new transfer fee from Barcelona to Paris Saint-Germain correctly. According to a quick Google, the fee will buy you four miles of untouched, beautiful Santa Barbara coastline, a 29-bedroom mansion in the Hamptons or a 1962 Ferrari 250 GTO, y’know, for the school run. Style, however, was strangely not included.

That’s because, despite the comical salary, Neymar (God bless him) is definitive proof that money cannot buy you style. Not even a semblance of it. Ever since the Brazilian wunderkind hit fame and fortune, we’ve been subjected to a sea of looks that can only be best described as ‘Eurotrash’: wet look gel, too-tight clothing, dog tags and asymmetric mullets last seen in the Doncaster branch of Toni & Guy circa 2003.

So, to celebrate Neymar’s landmark signing, we’ve collated some of the most, well, Neymar looks to ever be caught on camera. £198 million for this guy.

Banned Ana

Crop Noodle

All That Glitters…

A Case Of The Blues

Chained Down

Small Fish, Big Blonde

Mullet Over

Mad Hatter