It’s been more than a decade since Neil Strauss published his widely read (and widely criticised) book The Game, revealing the so-called secrets of pickup artistry. But a lot has happened in those 10 years. Well, Tinder. Mainly Tinder has happened.

So because the dating world moves on like your ex did (ouch, too soon?), it’s time for a refresher. We’ve compiled a step-by-step to having anyone at hello.

Go Tailor-Made

Your suit can be off-the-peg, but to land a date your opening gambit should be Savile Row bespoke.

“The most original chat up lines are the most effective,” says relationship expert Natasha Devon. “Do not attempt actual chat up lines unless they are witty and relatively unused, as they always sound cheesy and a little desperate.

Creep Off

Avoid anything that sounds stalkerish. Even if you think it’s coming across as attentive, it borders on creepy.

“If you choose to comment on something they’ve been doing, make it positive such as ‘you guys seem to be having a good time’, rather than ‘I’ve noticed you’ve been twirling your ice with your swizzle stick for 15 minutes now’,” says writer Milly Abraham.

Now In 3D

We’ve all become used to honing our opening chat via a smartphone screen, but remember there are real people out there, doing real things, IRL.

“Women are usually fine with getting wooed anywhere,” says Abraham. “Approaching a girl in an unlikely situation takes balls, and girls really like it when a man has balls (apart from literal ones in photos. Don’t text those).”

Two Become One

If the object of your desire is with a friend in a public space (pub, bar, supermarket etc.) and your chat up chat doesn’t work, under no circumstances should you move on to her pal.

And, however jokingly you mean it (or want it), do not think threesome chat will raise a giggle. “You’re not Dan Bilzerian, and suggesting that it might be fun for the girl you’ve just met to roll around with you and one of her childhood friends is not a good way to get either of them to like you,” says Devon.