Dear Soon-To-Be Graduate, 

This is not an ending. It’s not even really a beginning. In fact, it’s not helpful to think in these terms. Endings make you sad, beginnings make you scared, and graduating from college may make you feel both of these things, but there’s something really important you should remember: 

This is only the next step in your life, the next stage in the progression of existence. 

That matters because beginnings and endings are disruptions, and truthfully, not a whole lot will change right after college. You might get a new job, a new car, new surroundings, but you’re going to be the same person through all of those changes. 

I thought graduating was going to be this huge deal and change who I was and change my outlook on life, but honestly, I didn’t change a whole lot right away. It’s like all those people who ask me on my birthday if I feel any older, and my answer is always, “no, but I feel like I should feel older.”

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And let’s talk about the “should” for a second. 

“Should” is a word you should start using sparingly. (Yeah I know, I used ‘should’ in that sentence.) There is no “right” way of doing this whole rest-of-your-life thing. And there’s definitely no race you’re either winning or losing. It’s just one day after another, and no two days — or lives — are the same, and that’s how it’s supposed to be. 

There’s a small window here in the next few years where we have a lot of opportunities to try things, and fail at some things, and make some bad decisions, and make some really good decisions. But be wary that that phase doesn’t go on forever, because like it or not, the choices we make now — yes, even today — are going to shape the people we are a year, and ten years, and twenty years from now. And it’s going to go differently for every one of us.