What is it with young men and money? Hand a 19-year-old £50k a week and suddenly taste evaporates in the beams of a Range Rover Overfinch. It’s almost as though coddled young men, given the keys to world, won’t behave with the decorum of a Victorian minister.

But an off-pitch propensity for magenta suits is tough to express at work when the kit man defines what you wear. Which perhaps explains why footballers keen to inject some individuality into their looks tend to go overboard in the one place they have leeway: their hair. And Euro 2016 has offered a plethora of looks for the stylish man to swerve.

Marek Hamsik (Slovakia)

Despite bowing out to Germany, the Slovakian skipper’s performances have encouraged Chelsea to come sniffing. West London stylists, beware.

“It looks like his barber was mid-head shave when he realised he left the oven on,” says Adam Brady, utility style midfielder at Marylebone barber Ruffians.

“And yet Hamsik decided to nurture that little bud of hair. Perhaps he thinks it gives him some stature.”

The Fix:

“He needs to ask his barber to finish the job,” says Brady. Clippers will take care of the faux hawk, genetics the rest.

“Just keep the top a grade or two longer than the back and sides to make the most of his bone structure.”

Dimitri Torbinski (Russia)

The midfielder’s look is more abject than his team’s group stage exit.

“It’s Chuckle Brothers meets Nicola Sturgeon,” says Brady. A Venn diagram no man should inhabit. “Perhaps his mum still does it for him, bowl and all.”

The Fix:

Work with what you’ve got. “His face shape is proportional – he should be pushing the fringe back from, or across, his forehead into a textured, natural look. Not only will he find it easier to head the ball, he’ll also look less like a Lego man.” Win win.

Marouane Fellaini (Belgium)

Fellaini’s afro was already divisive, before the dose of Sun-In. “It’s just not appropriate for his long, thin face,” says Brady. “He looks like Sideshow Bob.”