When you first start dating someone you want to do all you can to impress them. You dress well, speak eloquently, and make sure she feels safe and comfortable around you. Listening to her conversation and being present are also keys to forming a relationship with your date. But while you are doing all you can to put your best foot forward, there’s also a chance you might say or do something that irritates her. Foot in mouth is a common disease that affects everyone, but you don’t want to be saying something out of line on your first couple of dates. It might be a small quirk that she can get used to or maybe it is a giant red flag that singles you out as someone she should not be dating? If it is the latter you might find yourself in trouble. So what turns a woman off in a relationship?

Like most things in life, this is subjective, but there are several things you should not be doing if you want to form a connection with your date. If you are really serious about wanting to see more of her and grow together, here are 20 things to avoid during your courtship.

1. Talking About Yourself

Who doesn’t like discussing the good things about themselves? This can become a problem when the conversation always leads back to you. If you are chatting away and always find yourself mentioning things you have done or experiences you have had, maybe it is time to step back and look at the whole picture.

Sure, you need to talk about yourself when getting to know someone, but that doesn’t give you the right to bore your date to death with your stories of traveling to Vegas with the boys or the history of your favorite sports teams. Ask her questions about her likes and dislikes and listen. Stop your endless stream of words to take in what she is saying and let her speak on things. Nobody wants to date a self-obsessed wanker.